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  • Literary Mash-Up Extravaganza, Day #1

    I can’t stop thinking up those litticisms.
    –Jeff Osier-Mixon

    Due to the staggering quality and variety of the submissions received for the Literary Mash-Up Extravaganza, we co-hosts have thrown caution (and judging) to the winds and will post all of the submissions, ten at a time in no particular order, daily until we run out of either submissions or stamina.

    Our heartfelt thanks to everyone participating! This has been an absolutely hilarious week.

    To Kill A Jonathon Livingston Seagull
    Scout runs amok at Esalon.
    Jack Shakely

    Finnegan’s 451
    Reader’s Digest condenses James Joyce’s seminal work.
    Gary Presley

    A Confederacy Of Jane Eyres
    A local genius is thwarted by well-meaning governesses who won’t leave his attic alone.
    Stacy Korn-Luebke

    A Long Day’s Journey into a Hard Day’s Night
    A dysfunctional family becomes a famous pop group.
    Michael Wright

    The Unbearable Lightness of Being The Idiot
    Cheating on his wife, his Czech mistress, and the fianceé of a good friend causes a gullible Russian prince to drive his car into a tree. Hence, the nickname.
    Sue Z. Smith

    The Old Mice and Men and the Sea
    Santiago, Lenny and George, determined to raise a stake so they can “Live on the fatta the lan,’” head out in the skiff to la mar in search of the great marlin. Even though they’re a crew of misfit bindle stiffs, they wage an epic battle—men against fish—and win. Tragically, Lenny pets the marlin too hard and it dies. George, in an act of mercy, cracks Lenny over the head with an oar and puts the poor bastard out of his misery. George and Santiago agree that Santiago will tend the rabbits instead.
    Heather Ophir

    The Mists of Frankie Avalon
    Don’t stand downwind of him after the cocktail party.
    Sheldon

    The King James and the Giant Peach Bible
    The new testament just got juicier.
    Bumbleboo

    The Da Vinci Code of the Samurai
    A math savant discovers that the lineage of Jesus actually leads to the the rise of Japanese feudal lords in the Middle Ages. The film version is a buddy movie starring Tom Hanks and Ken Watanabe, with Jackie Chan portraying the entire Chinese army from the Yuan Dynasty.
    Elwood P. Gray

    The Old Man and the C Programming Language
    Brian Kernighan and Dennis Ritchie struggle with a giant fish.
    Jeff Osier-Mixon

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    2 Comments

2 Responses to “Literary Mash-Up Extravaganza, Day #1”

  1. typehype said on May 6th, 2009 at 9:01 am

    What fun to read these posts. They’re all so good!

  2. gotheca said on May 6th, 2009 at 9:57 am

    Thanks! I can’t tell you how fun they were to keep receiving every day.

    Victoria

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Clients’ Successes

Scott Warrender
Short story author Scott Warrender is a Mentoring Program client. I have done full Copy, Line, & Developmental Editing on a number of short stories for him, the first of which was his poignant fictional memoir of Africa, ''The Boy With the Newsprint Kite,'' now published in the Foundling Review.

Clients’ Books


Bhaichand Patel is the author of two nonfiction books: Chasing the Good Life (Penguin Books India, October, 2006), and Happy Hours (Penguin Books India, October, 2009). I edited Patel's debut novel, When the Streets Were Cold and Dark.

I've edited a number of nonfiction essays for my friend Lucia Orth. (Many years ago, my contribution to Baby Jesus Pawn Shop was simply a peer critique and participation in a standing ovation.)

The poet Chris Ryan is the author of The Bible of Animal Feet (Farfalla Press, 2007). He has recent stories in Pank, Anemone Sidecar, and A Cappella Zoo. I edited Ryan's novel The Ishmael Blade and worked with him on his debut novel Heliophobia and WIP Pogue.