It really does amaze me how the edit still conveys the same sense of panic and confusion, but with fewer words. I know this is an important element in writing – to say it in as few words as possible – but I still tend to underestimate my reader and repeat what they are already getting from the dialog. The vivid words you retained, like darted, jerked and widened say a lot in this passage.

Kathryn

was thinking the whole idea that he’s out of her sight, separated from the blood on her hands would hit her hard as far as coming to grips with death and the fact that it can happen anytime.

A hard thing for teenagers to accept.

Jordan, don’t you love the ambiguity? I’m guessing we know what’s happened if we’ve read the whole novel, but just reading the climax left me wondering, “What happened to Matt? Did she do it?”

That’s why I broke that last line off into a paragraph of its own. So even if you know what happened you still get that frisson of Lady Macbeth—blood on her hands!